Oh….”Bother” … My knee!

Now, you KNOW that’s not what I really wanted to call this blog, but I thought I’d be polite for once!

Yesterday I went back to my knee consultant as three weeks ago I managed to hurt the right one again! Just as I was getting back into jogging Adam had me jump onto a little step with weights and the poor old knee decided that was a jump too far!

Actually I am reviewing my whole exercise “plan” and looking at what will motivate me again As I seem to have lost the buzz and am piling the weight on again.
This is NOT surprising as I have been sitting down far too much recently, and drinking alcohol again, and enjoying…yes, Enjoying…large portions.

So I only have myself to blame, really…I can see your heads nodding.

Sadly I have lost faith in my personal trainer. He never claimed to be an expert in recovery; he is just a trainer after all, not a physio. However now I am very wary of what he is going to get me to do.

Mr Knee Consultant has told me to take 6weeks “rest” from training and just do gentle walking as I have been pushed too quickly. So I called Adam to explain this and said I couldn’t expect him to keep my slot open and perhaps it is better to leave it.
As soon as I had made that call…to his answer phone … I felt much “lighter” and bought myself a little present for under the tree that had nothing to do with food or training!
Then Hubby called to see what Mr KC had said. I explained and my decision. Now, Hubby knows me well, and pointed out I’d need to make a firm date once a week to either swim or do something otherwise I wouldn’t do anything. My mood started to slide.
Then Adam called back. Oh boy. Of course he doesn’t want to lose a client, but he did go on, pointing out that he knew if I stopped training I am going to pile on the stones and more again.

Way to go on making a gal feel great…not!

They are both right. I do need motivation, and as I seem to lose my internal motivation so quickly and easily, external motivation is the best way forward…. But all it has left me feeling is that no one has faith in me to do the “right” thing; I have to always be watching myself; blah blah blah…

Go on, give me a good kick up the backside for being self-indulgent! Remind me that I am incredibly lucky to have all that I do, and that this is my only problem in life, and it is of my own making.

It’s all about choices, isn’t it. I have chosen to sit down & eat again. I have chosen not to get out and gently walk more. I chose to let Adam push me too fast…I could have refused to do those jumps- after all I am paying him, I chose to put him in charge.

It just seems difficult to get the “in charge” baton back into my hand!

Adam & I are taking a 2week break from eachother over the hols, but I am to keep writing the food diary ( I had let that slide too!) as if I was training. He wants to talk to the physio that I will be seeing to see what exercises he can give me to strengthen my muscles to support the knees in future. So he is trying to make it right.

And me? Let’s see shall we?


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In A Fug…

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No, I don’t mean Fog, I mean FUG…

It’s my word for where I am now.
It’s a tricky time of year for me, with emotions etc; but also I seem to have buggered my knee a bit again, and lost all my drive to eat sensibly etc! I want to get rid of my trainer, curl up with a box of chocs, a large glass of wine, and crap on the TV…

Only, I’m not too sure I really do want to do that.

I suspect that if I can blow away this Fug I will have the drive to get fit again; I don’t want to eat chocolate as I feel awful afterwards; I don’t like the hot flushes that come after too much sugar ( am having one just thinking about it!!!); I no longer like losing control with alcohol, and it doesn’t seem to take much these days!!! There isn’t much I can do about the TV scedules, apart from change the channel, or even turn it off, get up and do something else instead!!!! I won’t get rid of the trainer as I need to be pushed sometimes, but I will talk to him about changing the emphasis to avoid the knees.

So, I have all the tools to blow away this Fug…and I don’t mean a giant hair dryer! A little change here and there over the next few days will help me get back on track. It may mean spending a little less time with Son, but that’s not such a bad thing either!! I’m not going to be too hard on Me, after all, it is almost Christmas, but just a little kick here and there up the bum might be a god idea! feel free to join in the GENTLE kicking!!!

Right, I’m going to get up now… just as soon as this programme finishes…no, NOW!!

L x

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Those words will resonate with Douglas Adams fans as the words on the front of The Hitchhikers’ Guide.

In this context it’s because it’s 11/12/13…
Supposed to be auspicious to meet your soulmate….
On the other hand it’s the day I realise I have been a tad too laid back about Christmas preparations!

Things I have to do….

Order Turkey, Ham etc for the Holiday period.
Buy the tree…yes, a real one…yes, I know about the mess!
Wrap the presents…oh and buy Son’s main present…
Find out from Son what he wants, and no I am not buying him a new laptop this year!
Try to remember what/who I bought That for! ….
Decorate house…get decorations down from loft first…
Decide to chuck out things from loft whilst I’m up there…ask son to put big things in skip…
Change mind about some of those loft finds, clean & replace in loft…
Get poison for loft creatures ( won’t elaborate)…
Clean carpet under loft ladder…
Decide where to put tree now that computer is in that corner…
Move furniture around in hall…
Argue with Hubby about getting rid of my hall sofa…NO!…
Put tree in stand, fill with water, mop up spills,…
Tree lights -saying no more on that subject!…
Decorate tree…
Put presents under tree…wonder if there are enough…

Read back list and PANIC

Actually, read back the list, sip tea, look at clock, decide time for another mug of tea, laugh at list and realise I have 2 weeks to go, and always get it all done in time.
Decide not to panic, and be happy that there still is time for everything….
I just have to remember to do them!

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Oh, come on! Not at my age!!

This is ridiculous!
I suffered enough as a teenager, why are you making me suffer again?? I’m almost 55 for goodness’s sake!

“What is today’s rant about?” I hear you cry…


Yes, Mother Nature, and my skin have decided to turn the clock back and make me go through all that Cover-Up and Clearasil all over again!

And just as I’m about to go visit the In-Laws next weekend.

I have a biggie simmering beneath the surface, promising to be a veritable Vesuvius or worse! What is worse? One that never erupts, but lurks there, causing redness and a big bulge, always threatening to come through the makeup, quietly sniggering to itself!

What do you mean, “what spot, where?” It’s there, THERE, look! You can’t possibly miss it…need to borrow my glasses?

Apparently it is quite normal in menopause to re-suffer our teenage skin…even if you are spending a small fortune on face cleansers, toners, face packs, and the income of a small country on face creams promising to roll back the years, plump out the wrinkles, and leave you with the glowing skin of Youth…

Obviously this youth whose skin I now have suffered spots like me!

Well, it could be worse I suppose… I’m not surrounded by teasing school girls; nobody else in this house has noticed, and even if they did they wouldn’t comment ( they are men or animals). Also I can wear makeup each day without being given detention, and told to scrub that muck off my face! So growing older does have some good points!

Ok, Spot…you and I will continue with my regime… I will pretend I can’t see/feel you every second of the day and you will GO AWAY!!

We shall see who cracks first!

Meanwhile if any of you have any fail-safe ways of getting rid of menopausal spots send them to me please…and yes, I am drinking plenty of water!!


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